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Търсете във видеоклипове, участници, събития, аудио файлове, снимки и блогове Търсене
Алексей Костюченко
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kostychenko-aleks|Russian Federation

Адрес моей церкви http://www.baptistsurgut.ru Россия. Алексей. Russia. Aleksey.


Моята Молитва

Good afternoon uvazhaemye. address from Alekseya Kostyuchenko, inv.1gruppy, invalid, inhabitant Volgogradskogo building-интерната for aged and invalid. The journey plan In 2016 on |още

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Lost Aleksey Kostyuchenko
The Introduction to of the same name collection verse.



Having Read this collection, is conceived some drug addict or alcoholic about sense of the lifes? On all will Gosh!
The Springtime 2006 in one of the branches Mercy municipal podrazdeleniya Aliternativa I have found the fellow-villager, senior brother of the friend to my adolescence, Sergey. Amongst news told by him was сооб щение about deaths of my friend Ivana. Ivan died long and nerve-racking death. The Prison, drunkenness, wild lifestyle of my friend, have done its black deal. We with countryman were not seen several years. The Litter my life in past, Sergey tried to explain, as I wait approximately this fate. Having Listened to tragic history to ruins Ivana, I have asked the countryman: But Vanika repented in its shiftless life before death? Do Not know, has answered Sergey. And beside us shall go the talk about saving shower. Has Approached time to part, Serega has embraced me and will go. Leaving several steps, he turned, looked intently and pronounce: Leha, you this? Really and truth God there is?
The Certificate.

The Blessed husband, who does not go on advice wicked and does not cost(stand) on way sinful, and does not sit in meeting развратителей. The Psalm 1-1.

The Ma gave birth me, when her was 38 years. The Child I was not planned, but nothing in lifes does not can be in vain. I had a brother senior me for 10 years. When I was performed 1, my brother to froze to death (the coincidence?). And the whole my following life потекла under untiring, strict control of the ma: god forbid with me that will happen. The Untiring control for me ma concerned with whole its conscious life (the ma, forgive;pardon, this was through чур).
In 1976 I окончил the rural school. Our family has moved from sowed;sown in provincial городишко. After school I became to work at plant by turner. In 1979 will go in army, served in стройбате. Has Served 13 months, on household circumstance was demobilized. In 1980 returned home and bring earned in armies money eight hundred with than-that roubles. For eightieth year amount decent. Podsuetyasi, have gained in family car.
On nature I was communicative, problems in lifes nearly was not. I invited to be other bridegroom on five weddings, in general, was not last lad in companies and in lifes. And here is in this age I began to drink. As usually speak: on trace . Married, became to drink почаще. Was born the son, the second, became to drink else more often. Have Lived the семьей 7 years and разошлись. The Reason one drunkenness. But beside me and thoughts was not consider itself alcoholic. Remained without family, drink became less, but drinking bout from 2-3 days before week. The Family to return the desires was not, about creation new thought seldom. The Wife has done the attempt to restore the family, but my гордыня воспротивилась. Went the years, vodka firmly fell into my life, thoughts about family disappeared completely. The Ma, no time whittling, having realized that I swing under gradient of the lifes, has not stopped their own edifications and of suffering beheld all this. (The Father already was not, he deceased in 1981). At age 33-34 years I became to think that live not so, as necessary. And became to declare itself: Leha, will be enough!.. But not here that was. The Terrestrial vices засасывают so firmly, in their rash riverbed race so that impossible catches on to coast to be chosen in current whole of this. When this gets to consciousnesses, attacks the terror from helplessness, and absolutely is absent the thought to ask the help beside who that nor was. And begin to muffle this its helplessness by vodka, vodka! The Drinking bout started to get to month.
In 1997 has died the ma. The Fate of the ma tragic. 1920г. births, she has ed much несчастий in lifes. Ungrammatical, rustic woman has outlived the hunger 33, death 11 year, the second her(its) husband my father was an alcoholic. And I, son, seen result drunkenness, will go same perverted way this unexplained! One, absolutely one, and becomes else terrible спасенье search for in vodka! Notice that friends begin to avoid me, offensively and once again vodka! Here else difficult position in country, with work. As itself itself being understood is sold machine, but money on vodka. The House becomes the den, full dependency from amount drunk alcohol. Doshlo before white горячки. Has Fallen into hospital, have restored, but that with that?
And again itself appears the question, what change the house on apartment with additional charge, but additional charge to drink away? Easy! The Deal took place the springtime, has left in загул Awakened the autumn. The Problem one money no. Occurs one more exchange a vein with additional charge.
The Additional charge whole leaves on vodka. And strange deal, I shall peacefully realize that I alcoholic! But drunkard not to drink can not, and therefore drink away last its home. The Indifference to lifes absolute. While there were money nestled beside such drunkards as itself while there were money. But here is money did not become, vein no, but shame long ago no! And will go I live in cellars. In родном city, live at a rate of sewerages, but sometime overhand while that carefree run my children! The Good that small, do not think else that this signifies their file BOMZH.
The One and a half year of the veins in cellar. Communicated with idle youth - they so love the cellars! Came even sons former my friends, sent the regards from parents.
The Veins "well". The Borough small, nearly all know, including ментов. Did Not touch, felt sorry. But from this pity wanted to or be hung (these thoughts were present constantly). The Whole city considered me alcoholic and in some питейных institutions often filled gratis, in the same way and самогонщики: "Bitterns Leha, can, полегче will become, but that dies by chance beside me in courtyard".
And in this time fate sends in my life Vasiliya Lihomanova. The Unacquainted person, military officer, major in retirement, my person of the same age. Has Once asked me to help in than-that has invited in house, has. Other once, the third... And these people: Vasya, Nina wife him(it), Dimka and Andrey children, have offered me to live beside them! Have Not been squeamish about! In my consciousness this did not pack. I refused. Afterwards they have offered me to leave to live in village to father Niny he elderly, solitary мужичок, but I assistant. I have gone.
Has Lived more year. Drink became much less. Appeared the dumas to make the life as beside all people. Has Solved to go to Siberia, earn on small lodge, buy its corner, but will further is seen (in village Povolzhiya possible to buy inexpensively lodge).
In Surgute all were quite well: first worked the builder, afterwards give machine, place in dormitory, not pius s the daydream! But! Disappear the money, right, the documents full ruin! Will Only learn of this authorities, at 9 o'clocks of the evening then and there, in winter, emphatically offer to free the premises of the dormitory.
And newly bursts that internal of or for thread, which linked me with life. Gryadet New Year, how much nor run, find work problem! The Night in entrance(approach), on station, from everywhere гонят, the document no BOMZH, once again BOMZH!
Will Be enough! Buy vodka litre, захожу поглубже in park, drink all(on sober up head of the spirit came short) and... Finds me dog, which have removed to walk in park. Afterwards hospital, five operations, nine months of the treatment. The Amputation The Amputation The Amputation The Realization to else greater uselessness. Heal is reeked on cult, but not in shower. The Condition мерзопакостное! Run down from hospital on invalid's sidercar in nowhere, be that will! The Fortnight to lifes under balcony, fortnight deep пьянок (to relieve my sufferings any muzhik pleased was buy me to drink (the soviet compassion) mass folk around me saws, saws and here is appeared the Tone woman бальзаковского age. Podoshla once upon a time and has asked, not взирая on the whole intoxicate: Than you to help?
But me was on all spit. I do not know, as her to manage to define me in "Alternative" (the centre to rehabilitations). She has drived its machine, has sunk me and has taken in Solkino (the place of the location of the centre to rehabilitations indigent and fallen at all points people Alternative ). Proschayasi with me, she has said so: That my trouble were not vain, ask you, not step more - disappear! And I from that day has not drunk nor liquor-glasses. Taking the sincere compassion here is the most best coding. And the most interesting or terrible that I, not desired to become BOMZHOM, has fallen into most jack BOMZHEY! Here on each of us test to put nowhere, but for that beside many about itself opinion blame of the ruin to personalities that is pleased and who is pleased, but not ya. Seldom who will say itself guilty.
And here is here-that, I and has read for the first time about the God. This literature here in toilet was packed in toilet! The God has suffered the inhuman страданья, and I much. He went to the most fallen and measly, and helped him, and my life not sugar, but if and me to ask Him(it) about help? And I became be prayed for surrounding and for itself. This was me unbeknownst, sometimes seemed empty and foolish occupation, but The Gentlemen knocks on our heart with most our births: Let in Me, all will well . And I have let in, and now not stinger.

I learned;learnt to be complacent that that I have. All can in consolidating me Jesus Hriste Flp. 4 - 11,13.

Persistently waited and believed, and change have occurred, but not immediately. First, there were taunts, contempt. And for a long time absolute solitude, but faith helped выстоять. Having Come to believe, try to live on Bibles, and changes to my lifes obvious, this sees not only ya. Beside me problems with movement, but, in spite of this, appeared much good familiar. Due to him here is already fourth year, I nearly each sunday бываю in temple. The People on their own back carry me there and back where it is difficult to dispense the sidercar. In 44 has not only loved the poetry, try to write the poetry itself. Show the member Surgutskogo литобъединения North flicker . My verse Showers saint purity left In 2005г. in light collection. In 2007г. second collection verse YUdoli and collection verse "Lost". Presently live in Gerontologicheskom centre (the house aged). Get here not simply, but I here! Nothing in lifes does not occur in vain, and absolutely no accidents. Nesluchayno in my fate entered: Lihomanovy and Tone. Not accidentally dog will go to walk, but has found me. And such centre to rehabilitations, as Alternative , on Russia heave ho and обчелся, and one of them in Surgute, I think, too not accidentally. The Majority lost cushion about its past, but me, spirit my, spurs about this say, not accidentally. I do not know that else me уготовано in lifes?.. Possible say, поживем see! But, expensive my, take me such, what I there is today. If b we were met years 6 back, I certain, seen me former, nobody from you not even it was conceived about my future. Beside me former future was not. I long thought, am able I so be frankly explained with unacquainted people, with young people. And came to output it is necessary without fall since even idly self-propelled on lifes of the person, seen underfoot gap, can not not turn to people and not to warn here gap! Back! But uzh if came off and fly to this abyss, that, in my opinion, it is necessary to yell insofar is enough power: "TROUBLE"!.. But hear or no, is turned from this way or no, will depend on that, as I shall say, as крикну. And if going вослед people will catch this cheer, передадут him(it) from mouths in mouth further dalishe.., signifies, we гомо сапиенс people reasonable. Then and you will be able to come on help, either as I helped no time not indifferent people. And these зернышки of the human participation, in fate slitherring on inertias of the lifes already fallen, but person, will give всходы.
I do not call you to go on street and find the wretch. Begin with itself. The Physicians speak disease easier to warn, than вылечить. But our society painfully, young and old alike. Personally I moment "diseases" has yawned. It Be Cured happened to it is enough high price.
Beside me two s live on Volga, but I him father in passport only. My drunkenness has transformed me from father in делателя детей. The Father not one, gave birth, but one, gave birth, grew and воспитал. They grew with me before five-year age and, when I became the невыносим, wife and children has left. The Passion to vodka has upstaged my look at tears wife, has disconnected the reason from future детей and, possible, I the present image pay for this.
The Springtime 2006г. I have written the letter a family, asked to forgive me. But in my past life so much всякой to vilethings that even answer, VWXbe drafty this can not hitherto entrench to me.
And completely I cure, probably, only got answer any. Forgive me, dear! Beside you, probably, and so in достатке of the moral admonitions, but this my nearly исповедь немножко another.
Address to young people: My children of your age, interests and, probably, attitude to lifes such, as beside you. And I, обращаясь to you, dialect and with them. Your looks at this history miscellaneouses, this orderly. And was sound if you, read this, have discussed read off parent. Alas, but many parents in this plan too not безгрешны. Tell him about this book.
In Biblical timeses of the veins of the person Foma nonbeliever .
He it is necessary has personally touched to make sure (And how much else such blind and deaf on our land? Can, therefor I and remained reaped that people, глядя on me, were conceived about sense of the lifes). Foma, seen воскресшего of the Jesus, did not become to feel is reeked Hrista, he has been enough seen and heard all were absolutely real.
Do Not lose itself in lifes, much often loss can be irrevocable.

Confirm that in my lifes occur change from will power, carrying, accidents and any other terrestrial determinations this your right, but beside me other opinion.

the December 13 2002г in park Surguta Cedar Ravine man выгуливал dog. And here is in side from track dog something have found and became is called to bark the Master go to look that there such. Approaching, he has seen: dog licks the person freezing person This was ya. Such a prose to lifes. But in this tragedies there is and the other side given moment, about this poetry:

Not time to murmur.

I in handfuls snow зачерпнуть impossible, And odd number trope before winch to beat a path.
The Winter lead I itself carefully, With недавней of the time became her(its) respect.
The Winter does not forgive the error and weakness - With frost of the fun to jest nor to that.
Instinctively окутает the infirmity, weariness, And dream leads away in bottomless darkness
Meliknulo in consciousness: sun and summer, Charming virgo on дивном meadow.
Run I for her and call - no answer.
Stumbled, fell, well but get up can not.
Do Not feel the legs, instead of hands as if braid, Lie that log, nor give and nor take.
Appeared виденьем spouse and children, And see in сторонке deceased mother.
Glyadit on me, closing ладошкой, And is woke;waked has yelled: "Son, weathers!
Came you invalid, perverted track.
Pokaysya before Gospodom, in sin not input".
Vzmolilasi soul in darkness about спасенье:
- forgive;pardon Me, Gosh, mercies ask!
- I слышу, my son, on любви - снисхожденье.
Who искренен requests, that воскрешу.
In person I have winnowed the warm дыханьем, But eye not to open, and week to call.
Раздался suddenly bark it is necessary me with подвываньем - a Dog has found me, became to lick.
There is angels God's собачьим with image, Without faith in Hrista this it is difficult to understand.
The Envoys Gentlemen внемлют praying, I pleased that has haved time to this heart to take.
Let in handfuls snow зачерпнуть impossible!
Let odd number trope before winch to beat a path!
But I beside fates and troubles not hostage Gentlemen славлю! Not time to murmur.


As otherwise?

Nobody not ведомо That life заповедано, And fate is predetermined.
I agree with this, but!..

Stisnuv fists sorely, I shall say itself: Dokole Shall this I take?
Wait the закланья? - It is Necessary to live!

Radiate the person сиянье, Glorify the God мирозданье.
Be loved and love, А otherwise it is necessary li to live?!


Has Said me Spirit Saint

Soydi with curbs, my son, SHagni on main road.
Now you in lifes not one And, thank god, thank god!

Izranen body and soul, Swallowing dust, insult, tears, You went, VWVwage war itself with itself, А on you sparkled the thunderstorms.

So turned to you I взор.
Thundered the thunders an состраданья.
I with you talk, But you sobbed One изгнанье!

And heard only only itself, Sins have upstaged взор your, reason.
But demons вкруг you, pipe, Whirlled with type ugly.

You low pal, was split in blood, Lie, взирая sorrowfully skyward.
And I have heard Savaof!
forgive;pardon For all, водички to me.

Has Drawn apart the sky I hand, Gave вопрошающему влаги.
Thank you, Gosh expensive has Heard I: Christ You Blagiy!

VWVget up;stand up смелее, Fallen son, SHagni on main road.
Lost much, but one Its way has elected in glory of the God!

The Faith that approaches the day, when I introduce the possibility to tell all this society of the people thinking that beside them all successfully and beautifully that all beside them under checking and take itself in hands if that, they will be able any time. Not so all simply, what seems.
I am an invalid 1 groups - an amputation of both legs above knees, right cyst of the hand, all finger on left cyst of the hand. And with loss whole this, visualize, запела soul! THANK GOD! The Certificate this my creative activity and joy from realization that I am fallen off from humiliations and sufferings emotional, which do not go nor in what comparison with physical inconvenience, инвалидность this with tolerance, moral and spiritual decay this terribly, believe.

My electronic address:
kostychenko-aleks@yandex.ru
And site : http://www.kostjuchenko.narod.ru Shall pleased new acquaintance.
The Big group of the acquaintance of mine, not верующих in our Gentlemen speak: Aleksey, having read this, in you will now prod the finger and, can be, will become to spit in your address, life will not become difficult?.. After described here event to humiliate me already it is difficult. But if on essences nothing, I not proud утрусь.

The Jesus has said him: Vozlyubi Gentlemen of the God your all heart your and всею shower твоею and all understanding your: сия there is first and the most commandment; the second is befitted by her: возлюби near your, as most itself. From Matf.22 37,39. Amen.

P.S.
In 2007г. has entered in Surgutskiy State university, faculty social technology.
Zaochnoe education.

Alternative MOUSTACHE HMAO-YUgry, the centre to rehabilitations indigent and lost in lifes of the people. Mercy - a branch Alternatives Surgut.

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